One Child Counts

So a while back, I was talking with a couple people about, well, lots of things. Business was the overarching thing, I guess. One of the people asked the other how many children another person had. Her response was "just one." 

"Oh! One child doesn't count! Well, it does, but you know what I mean!" 

This last part was directed at me. I nodded and shrugged but inside I thought, No! I don't get what you mean! I get why she said it, and I know she didn't mean it maliciously or anything like that, she would never say anything maliciously. But that made me start thinking, and I still think back on it.

This is a problem. Why? Why are mothers so catty? Why do we compare each other? I get caught up in it too, but why do we do this!?

I've often thought back to that conversation, especially lately. I desperately want another baby. I want so badly to expand our family, and it's just not happening. It's heartbreaking. So thinking "One child doesn't count" is devastating. One child DOES count!

Whether you have one child or twelve, they all count! We are all mothers. We feel the heartache when our child is hurt, the frustration when our child throws a temper-tantrum, the exhaustion we feel when they're sick and need to be held... There are so many experiences that we have as mothers, and just because some of us "only" have one, doesn't mean we don't feel and agonize like every other mother. 

Saying or thinking anything like "well she only has one, so...," is a terrible thing. It needs to be erased from our minds. Don't discount the feelings and experiences of a mother just because she 'only' has one child.

You're busy? So is she! Yes, things get hectic when you have lots of children. I see how crazy things get with my siblings who have multiple kids. I've seen dear family friends who had twelve kids and are now raising two of their grand-children. I get it. Things get crazy.

But to think that just because someone "only" has one child means that they aren't busy and stressed out, or that they don't "get" it, is blasphemous. You have no idea what is going on in their life. If you're close to them, you might have some idea. However, if you are TRULY close to someone with "only" one child, then you would never even think about the fact that they "only" have one child.  

Let's not compare ourselves. Instead, let's encourage one another. Let's be there for one another. Be there with a hug or a kind word on a bad day. We all have them! Let's replace the judging and comparing with compassion and love. 

This life is hard enough as it is. Let's not make it harder for one another. And remember. One child most definitely counts.